Why it’s Great to be a Guy
-Your ass is never a factor in a job interview.
– Your last name stays put.
– The garage is all yours.
– Wedding plans take care of themselves.
– You don’t have to curl up next to a hairy ass every night.
– Chocolate is just another snack.
– You can be president.
– You can wear a white shirt to a water park.
– You never feel compelled to stop a friend from getting laid.
– Car mechanics tell you the truth.
– You don’t give a rat’s ass if someone notices your new haircut.
– The world is your urinal.
– Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.
– You never have to drive to another gas station because this one’s just too icky.
– Wrinkles add character.
– You don’t have to leave the room to make emergency crotch adjustments.
– Wedding Dress $2000; Tux rental $100.
– If you retain water, it’s in a canteen.
– People never glance at your chest when you’re talking to them.
– The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
– New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
– Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with: “So, notice anything different?” – One mood, all the time.